


Take Good Care Of My Baby

by CallTheBaker



Series: Pupcake and Babies [2]
Category: Call the Midwife
Genre: Angst, Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Gen, Grief, Hurt, Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-02-22 03:26:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13158273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallTheBaker/pseuds/CallTheBaker
Summary: Modern AU where Patsy receives her Father's letter from Hong Kong. The question is can she bare to leave her job, her wife and most importantly, her child?A modern take on Patsy's relationship with her Father and how she handles his final moments.Set in the same world as 'You're Having My Baby' but you don't need to have read that to understand this.





	1. Christmas Eve

For most four year olds the last place they’d want to be on Christmas Eve was a maternity ward. Most four year olds would want to be at home, annoying their parents and refusing to go to bed as they eagerly awaited Santa’s arrival. Emilee however was not most four year olds. She knew the ward corridors and every member of staff that walked along them. She was used to the sound of screaming women, crying babies and pale looking Husbands. She hoped secretly that Phyllis would be there today - she was a bit like her Mam - she always, always had sweeties in her uniform pocket! 

As she trotted towards the Nurses Station, the young girl was thrilled to see the stern looking woman scribbling away. Emilee broke into a gallop, rushing over to her older friend, before Delia could stop her. She didn’t say a word, simply grinned up at the Nurse. Phyllis smirked, pretending she hadn’t noticed Emilee she continued to work. Emilee giggled, clambering onto Nurse Crane’s knee.

“Emilee!” Delia chided, “What have we said about climbing on people?” 

“But Phyllis isn’t a people. She’s Phyllis.” Emilee shrugged.

“A person-“ Delia sighed.

Phyllis sent a sympathetic glance to Delia before handing Emilee a Haribo Coca Cola bottle from the tub at the side of her desk. Emilee was bright, funny and above all else cheeky. She was a carbon copy of Delia to look at but for the fact she was tall for her age. Her personality however was much more in line with Patsy’s - she even had the raised eyebrow and fishhook smile down to a tee. She was a popular member of the ward, doted on by everyone she came into contact with and more than used to sitting quietly when her parents were working on opposing shifts. Tonight though Emilee would have no need to be quiet - it was tradition that the members of the ward would sing Christmas Carols for the patients and throw them a little party. After all - no one wanted to be in hospital over Christmas. Although, Delia hadn’t told Patsy they were coming. She’d come up with a thin-veiled excuse about Emilee probably being in bed early.

Patsy yawned as she wrapped her stethoscope around her neck. She’d just finished her last rounds and was absolutely exhausted. She wondered briefly whether she could get away with sneaking off and not bothering with the carolling, but the better part of her won out, and she trudged slowly towards the Nurses Station. She readjusted her Christmas jumper. She hadn’t been sure when Trixie had suggested they all wear them but she had to admit it did have her feeling slightly more festive than she might otherwise be. She reconciled herself with the fact she no longer had to work Christmas Day at least. 

She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn’t notice her wife stood down at the Nurses Station or her daughter clambering off Nurse Crane’s knee. It wasn’t until she heard ‘Mummy’ shouted from up the corridor that she looked up and saw them. She couldn’t help the enormous grin that spread across her face or the chuckle that escaped her as Emilee rushed towards her, arms open, her young face full of excitement at seeing her.

“Hello darling.” Patsy beamed picking her up and spinning her round before pressing a kiss to her cheek, “This is a pleasant surprise, to what do I owe the pleasure of such fine company?” 

“Singing Carrots.” Emilee responded.

“Carols.” Patsy corrected. 

She adjusted her daughter more comfortably onto her hip as she made her way over to where Delia and everyone else was stood. Delia beamed as she saw her wife and daughter approaching, the sight of them together never failed to warm her heart. She ran her hand soothingly over Patsy’s back as she reached her. 

“Good day?” Delia asked.

“It is now.” Patsy responded with a wink as Barbara handed her and Delia the carol sheets. She scanned it before glancing at Emilee, “Ready to sing some songs?” 

Emilee nodded enthusiastically as Shelagh signalled for them all to start singing the first song.

“Away in a manger…” 

There was no doubt that the loudest voice was Emilee’s.

———

“Bed time?” Patsy asked. 

A slight smirk graced her features as she nodded her head towards Emilee. The youngster had draped herself across the chairs in the waiting area, completely oblivious to the noise and laughter occurring around her. Delia chuckled as she glanced at the time on her watch.

“We ought to be making tracks anyway, Pats. We’ve got a lot to do. I didn’t have time to chop the vegetables for dinner tomorrow or set the table or-“ 

Patsy caught Delia’s hands, raising one eyebrow with a practised and knowing smile. Delia relaxed at the simple gesture.

“Stop worrying.” Patsy whispered, “I imagine keeping our daughter entertained was a feat in itself. The rest doesn’t matter, we’ll do it tonight.”

“But Pats, you must be exhausted.” 

“I must be.” Patsy hummed as she let go of Delia’s hands and moved to wear Emilee was sleeping. “But I don’t feel it.” She murmured, picking up her daughter gently. “Let’s go home.” 

——

“Out for the count as my Mam would say.” Delia smiled as she entered the kitchen where Patsy was peeling potatoes, plopping them into a pan of water. “Pats, just help me with bringing the presents down, I can do that. You need rest.” 

“Delia, I know how excited Em was yesterday with me and how hard work she was because of it. I can imagine how impossible she’s been today… you need rest too and a job shared is a job halved. I’m almost done here. You go set the table and then we’ll bring Em’s presents down and then we’ll sit and enjoy Santa’s late night supper.” Patsy winked, nodding her head towards the plate that sat on the coffee table. “It’s quite a spread.”

“Em suggested we give Santa a choice.” Delia chuckled, “She thinks that eating millions of mince pies must be pretty boring so she’d give him the option of something a little less boring.” 

“So she’s given him a sample of the entire kitchen?” Patsy winked.

“Something like that.” Delia replied, “Along with a bottle of water, a glass of milk, a glass of Vimto, a bottle of Irn Bru and a bottle of Coca-Cola.” 

“And the whisky?” 

“That might have been me.” 

“Delia Busby-Mount.” Patsy gasped in mock horror. 

“I thought ‘Santa’ might like a night cap.” 

Patsy grinned.

“Let’s get those presents down and under the tree.”

———

Delia sighed in relief as she sank down onto the sofa. She smiled as she felt Patsy flop down beside her, burrowing into her chest. The Welsh woman pressed a kiss to the top of her exhausted wife’s head. She was about to settle down when the plate of food and the tumblers and bottles surrounding it caught her eye. It would be an eclectic midnight feast. There was a mince pie, olives, a few Monster Munch, a Wispa chocolate bar, two Jammy Dodgers, oranges and some pate and bread sat on the plate. 

“Before you get too comfy, we have to eat this.” Delia murmured to Patsy who hummed in response. 

The red-head tiredly sat up, reaching for the whisky before adding a dash of Coca-Cola. As Delia reached for the plate, she noticed a pile of letters and cards sat underneath it.

“I forgot about those.” Delia winced settling back down with the cards in one hand and the plate in the other.

“They’ll just be Christmas cards.” Patsy mumbled as she too re-settled, her head resting on Delia’s chest. 

Patsy reached out for an olive as Delia began opening the cards one by one, reading them out as she did so. It was only when she reached the last one that she paused. Patsy’s relationship with her Father had grown ever more distant since Emilee’s birth. As Patsy relished her new role as a Mother, her distaste for her Father had only grown. He’d never sent a single birthday card or Christmas present to his Granddaughter and Patsy struggled to comprehend how anyone could be so far away and so distant from their own child. She’d stopped trying to be even the slightest bit cordiale with her Father - instead opting to dote on her own family.

“What is it?” Patsy asked without moving. She didn’t need to look at Delia to know something was bothering her.

“This one, it’s for you.” Delia replied quietly, “I think it’s from your Father.” 

Patsy sat up. She took the card and immediately stood up.

“What are you doing?” 

“Putting this where it belongs.” Patsy grumbled as she headed towards the bin.

“Pats-“

“I’m not interested in another card signed by his secretary.” Patsy growled. 

“Well at least put it on the side so we can recycle it tomorrow.” Delia responded, “Although I do think you should at least open it.” 

“Why? We both know that he won’t have included you or Em in the card.” Patsy spat, slamming the card down on the side. 

“Because despite everything he is your Father. How would you feel if Em-“

“Don’t compare me to him, Delia.” Patsy warned. 

“I’m not comparing you to him.” Delia sighed, “Look, it’s up to you what you do and I’m not going to argue with you about it on Christmas… Day.” She finished, noticing the clock strike midnight, “Now come back over here and wish me a Merry Christmas.” 

Patsy dipped her head in an apologetic smile before reaching her hand down to Delia. The smaller woman frowned but stood up, allowing Patsy to pull her close and kiss her slowly. As they pulled away, a puppy eyed Patsy offered Delia a small smile. 

“I’m sorry.” She whispered, “It’s just I look at Em and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her. Nothing else matters but her and I just… I want her to always know she’s loved and I can’t fathom how… I wish my Father felt that way. I know I shouldn’t let it bother me but…”

“Of course it bothers you Pats.” Delia smiled, her hand reaching up to stroke Patsy’s cheek. “And that’s ok.” 

“I tried, Deels.” Patsy implored, her eyes searching her wife’s. 

“I know you did, darling.” 

“And he still didn’t want me.” 

Delia closed her eyes tight as she felt Patsy collapse into her, the taller woman’s face buried in her shoulder. She held her wife tight, cursing her damned Father for what felt like the millionth time in their relationship. 

Patsy’s heart may not be broken anymore but that didn’t mean Delia had managed put all the pieces back together. 

No, Patsy’s heart wasn’t broken, but it was chipped.


	2. The Card

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas Day... will Patsy read the card?

“He’s been! Mummy, Mam, he’s been, he’s been, he’s been!” 

Patsy grumbled and rolled over, pulling the duvet over her head as Emilee bounced onto the bed. Delia rubbed her eyes, smirking slightly as she saw Patsy’s grumpy form concealed beneath the covers, she glanced at the clock rolling her eyes as she noticed the time read just gone four. They’d been in bed for less than four hours.

“Em, remember what we said yesterday?” Delia asked tiredly. At Em’s ‘I’m-going-to-pretend-I-have-no-idea-what-you-mean’ expression she continued, “About what time we could get up on Christmas Day?”

“But he’s been!” 

“What does the clock say Emilee?” Delia asked. 

“Don’t know.” 

“I think you do.” 

“Four.” Emilee mumbled.

“And what does it need to say before we can get up?” Delia prompted.

“Seven.” 

Delia nodded, “If you promise to go to sleep until seven, you can get under the covers, but you can’t wake Mummy up before then ok?” 

Emilee nodded enthusiastically and jumped under the covers, screwing her eyes tight shut. Patsy rolled over, a smirk plastered across her features. She lifted one arm and ran it gently, eyes still closed, down Delia’s arm, pulling her closer so they cocooned their daughter. 

“Well played.” She whispered. 

——

At precisely seven o’clock Emilee awoke both her parents by jumping on their bed. Patsy despite her earlier reluctance had jumped out of bed, throwing on her dressing gown and handing Delia hers. Delia smiled tiredly in thanks, allowing Patsy to help her into it. Emilee had already raced out of the room and so, before she could start without them, Patsy took Delia’s hand and led her towards their living room. Emilee was already dancing around the presents, her eyes wide and her hands pressed against her face. 

“All for me?” She asked.

“Most of it is.” Patsy smiled. “But we have to read the tags? Ok?” 

Emilee nodded and raced for the pile of presents. Delia and Patsy eased themselves down onto the floor just behind her, laughing as she began to drag her presents out one by one. Either Delia or Patsy would read the tag before allowing Emilee to open it. Emilee, despite half the people not being in the room, said ‘thank you’ after every gift causing both her parents to share a knowing and amused smile over her head. Eventually, Emilee had opened all her presents and was happy enough playing with each one in turn. Seeing their daughter would be occupied for a while, Delia stood up, nodding at Patsy to follow her who did so. The smaller woman came to a halt in the kitchen, her arms reaching out to pull Patsy to her.

“I know we’ve broken with tradition this year, not going to Mam’s and with it being Em’s first Christmas where she really understands and what have you but…” Delia reached behind the bread bin, “I thought some traditions were worth keeping.” 

Patsy grinned as she took the delicately wrapped box, holding it in one hand as she reached into the pocket of her gown, pulling out her own perfectly wrapped box. Delia smiled, taking it in both hands. 

“Great minds and all that.” Patsy murmured. 

“Go on, you first.” Delia grinned. 

Patsy smirked as she began to rip the paper off. The tradition had started the first Christmas Patsy had spent at Delia’s parents. They’d bought perfectly lovely gifts to put under the tree for one another but kept a couple back so they could have their own private moment elsewhere. Back then, the gifts had been of a slightly more risqué nature. As they’d grown older the gifts had become much more heartfelt and meaningful and this year it seemed would be no different. Beneath paper was a white box and as Patsy popped it open she gasped. 

“Oh Deels.” She breathed as she lifted the item within it out. It was a necklace, delicate and simple with a love heart locket in it. She opened it, tears forming as she noticed the photos within it, one of Delia and one of Emilee. “It’s beautiful.” 

“So you’ll always know how much we love you.” Delia smiled. 

“Thank you. I love it.” Patsy whispered, “Your turn.”

Delia nodded, making short work of her own box. She frowned at the length of it before clicking the box open. She picked up a piece of paper, reading it before beaming at Patsy. 

“An overnight spa trip?” 

“I thought we needed some Patsy and Delia time.” Patsy said with a genuine smile, “Since Em was born we’ve not had much time alone and with her, work and just general life, I thought it might be nice for us to have a little retreat and with it only being one night, I’m sure Em won’t mind a trip to Grandma Busby’s or Auntie Trixie’s?” 

“It is about time we left her isn’t it?” Delia asked. “For one night anyway.”

“We have to do it at some point.” Patsy agreed. “The only snag with that voucher is we have to use it in January.” 

“Get it cheap did you?” Delia winked.

“I wish.” Patsy huffed. “But I did opt for a Winter Wonderland package which is only available until the end of January.” 

“Hmm… right, come on. We need to get dressed, get this house looking half decent and then we need to get everything in the oven. Trixie, Christopher, Val and Phyllis will be over before we know it and we need to get everything in order.” 

——

The day had been positively lovely. Trixie, Christopher, Val and Phyllis had been delightful company and all had put up with Emilee recruiting them one by one to play with all of her toys. Even Christopher, who wouldn’t be seeing his daughter until tomorrow, had indulged the youngster. Eventually, after the meal had been eaten, the board games played and packed away and the Christmas specials on TV watched, Delia had taken a sleeping Emilee off to bed. Patsy stretched upwards deciding she ought to tidy up. She wandered over to the sink, about to start washing up when she noticed the red envelope that sat upon the counter. She sighed, she should have known Delia wouldn’t throw it. She picked it up hastily and made her way towards the bin when she stopped. She wanted to throw it away but Delia’s voice rang clearly in her mind.

_‘He’s your Father, cariad.’_

“A shit one.” She mumbled to herself. 

She stared at the envelope in her hands, glancing at the stamp that told her it was from abroad. She frowned as she noticed that her name was hand-written. For the past couple of years it had been printed, the stamp nothing more than a frank. She hadn’t noticed it last night. She supposed she’d been too consumed with fury and disappointment. Still, this didn’t exactly mean anything. Chances are he’d screwed his secretary and got rid of her and this new replacement had sought to make more of an effort for her boss’ daughter. She could hear Delia moving around and smiled. Delia. Her love, her support and her constant. She thought back over all they’d been through and shook her head as Delia’s voice rang clearly through her mind again.

_“I know I’m right, sweetheart. I always am. It’s just a game of waiting for you to come round to my way of thinking and well, I think I’m rather good at it now.”_

It was true, Patsy thought, Delia was always right. Delia wanted her to open this and so she would. After all, it was Christmas and even Patience Mount had some Christmas spirit left in her… and a promise of an activity filled evening. If all else failed, Delia would almost certainly not fail to take her mind off of the card later.

Before she could change her mind she ripped it open, pulled it out and unfolded it. Her eyes widened as she noticed the card was filled with a hand-written message. She didn’t remember her Father’s writing looking like this, but then again, it had been almost two decades since she’d last seen it. She began to scan the writing quickly, gasping as the reality of what she was reading set in. 

_‘Nurse. Developed a de-generative condition of the nervous system. Asks for you. Please come at once.’_

Patsy swallowed, leaning back against the cold kitchen top. She looked up as she tried to process what she had just read. It was then she noticed Delia looking at her, a quizzing expression upon her face. The shorter woman moved towards her wife and took the hand that wasn’t holding the card, grounding her. Patsy held the card towards Delia. The younger woman eyed her, cautiously taking it. She gasped as she read the contents, her eyes shooting up to meet Patsy’s. 

“Guess he finally wants me.” Patsy croaked as a single tear slid down her cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has left kudos, comments, read this or sent me a message so far. It's super encouraging :) I just hope you continue to enjoy it!


	3. Old Habits

Delia side stepped Patsy making her way around her wife and towards a little trinket box she had tucked away in a corner of their bookshelf. She quickly twisted the lock, opening it and finding what she was looking for. Patsy stood watching, her voice caught in her throat as she tried to keep her tears at bay. She’d expected Delia to take her into her arms, hold her close and let her cry it out. She had not expected her to start rooting around in a tiny little box. Patsy didn’t even know what was in the box or that it was there.

“Deels?” She croaked.

Delia turned and held out her hand. A single cigarette and a lighter sat upon her palm. Patsy eyed her warily. Delia had made her promise to quit on their wedding day and Patsy had for the most part, other than at times of extreme stress, but since Emilee had been born Patsy had only smoked two cigarettes and none at all for the past two years. 

“I don’t know why I kept these.” Delia murmured. “I spotted them the day after you threw all your lighters  and things away. You’d left these on the side - probably thought you’d have one last smoke.” She took a breath, “I know I shouldn’t give you these but… I think you need it.” 

Patsy took the offered cigarette with a small smile and a shaky hand. She held her hand out to Delia, tugging her to their front door. She leant her back against the wall outside as Delia stood in the doorway. She raised the cigarette to her mouth, annoyed when she couldn’t get the tremor in her hands to stop as she attempted to light it. Delia smiled sadly, taking the lighter and the cigarette and lighting it before passing it back. Patsy took a hasty, deep drag. She felt the smoke fill her lungs and leant back, the stress of the moment leaving her with every exhale. She looked up towards the sky. It was clear, the stars and moon hanging high above her. She turned to her wife.

“Thank you.” Patsy whispered, holding her free hand out. 

Delia took it, running her thumb soothingly over her knuckles. She circled the wedding ring that sat on Patsy’s finger, remembering the moment she put it there and the promises it represented.

“What are you going to do?” Delia asked quietly. 

“I don’t know.” Patsy admitted, “What is there to do?” 

“Are you going to see him?”

Patsy took a drag of her cigarette.

“Patsy.” Delia probed.

“No.” Patsy responded flatly, “I know you think I should-“

“I-“

“Delia, you do, don’t deny it.” Patsy snapped, “But he has done nothing for me, nothing. He can’t just demand I return. Besides it isn’t that simple… this isn’t just about me or even you. There’s Emilee to consider and I’m sorry but I’m not leaving my daughter.” 

“Who says you have to leave her?” Delia asked quietly, “Who says that we can’t come with you?” 

“We’re not going.” Patsy said with finality, “Besides, we both have work and Emilee will be starting school.” Patsy stubbed the cigarette out, “He made his choice, Delia and now I’ve made mine.” 

Patsy moved past Delia and made her way inside. Delia closed her eyes for a moment before shutting the door and following Patsy back through into their living room. She understood Patsy’s reaction - of course she did - and it wasn’t unexpected. She’d lived with and loved Patsy long enough to know all about her stubborn, prickly streak but she couldn’t help but wonder if her beloved wife would regret not making amends with her Father whilst she had the chance. She hated Charles Mount for what he’d put his daughter through but having Emilee had given Delia a renewed appreciation for her own parents and made her realise just how important family was. She’d forgiven her Mother for all her earlier sins and made much more of an effort to keep in contact with her own Father. It seemed almost ironic that it was having Emilee that had made Patsy completely cut her own Father off.

Delia took a moment before entering their bedroom. Patsy was sat upon the bed, partly undressed. She didn’t look up as her wife entered, simply sat and stared at her feet. Delia swallowed before moving to the dresser. She knew that a ‘Prickly Pats’ required careful handling, especially a hurting and confused ‘Prickly Pats’. She’d had years of practise in dealing with her wife and her various moods and she knew that right now, ignoring Patsy and getting ready for bed would be the best course of action. 

Patsy eventually looked up and across to where Delia was brushing her hair. The sight caused Patsy’s breath to hitch. _She was so beautiful,_ Patsy thought. Slowly, she stood up moving over to Delia and gently taking the brush from her hands. Delia allowed her too, her eyes watching Patsy through the mirror as the taller woman gently ran the brush through her hair, her hand moving a lock of brunette hair over her shoulder. 

“I’m not asking you to agree with me.” Patsy finally murmured, looking up into the mirror so that their eyes met. She placed the brush down on the side. “But I am asking you to support me.”

Delia turned around so that she was facing her wife. She raised a hand to gently cup Patsy’s face and shook her head with a slight smile.

“Always.” Delia promised, “You never need ask for that, cariad.” 

Patsy couldn’t help the fish-hook smile that adorned her features at Delia’s simple yet heartfelt promise. As Delia’s hand pulled her gently downwards, Patsy couldn’t help but wrap her arms around her wife and pull her close as their lips met. She’d intended for the kiss to be chaste, the sealing of a promise but as Delia hummed pleasurably, Patsy found herself deepening the kiss. She wanted to forget. She wanted to feel. She wanted to love and be loved. 

“Pats?” Delia questioned breathlessly as they pulled away, breathing heavily. 

Patsy smirked and pulled her vest top off. 

“Answer your question?” Patsy smirked. 

“Like that is it?” Delia asked with a raised eyebrow as she placed her hands on Patsy’s hips and pushed her towards their bed.

“Exactly like that.” Patsy responded, her hands tugging at Delia’s shirt as the back of her legs hit the bed. She sat down, pulling Delia with her. “Merry Christmas Mrs Busby-Mount.”

As Patsy’s lips found hers once again, Delia allowed herself the luxury of an evening indulging her wife, but not before making a mental note to keep her eye on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to post this. Work has been absolutely crazy (it still is actually) and on top of that I'm also applying for Masters degrees at University! Anyway, I hope ya'll enjoy this. It's gonna be a bit of a slow burn for the first few chapters I'm afraid!


	4. Happy New Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello... I'm alive... 
> 
> It's New Year... but does it mean a new beginning?

“Smoking again?”

Patsy didn’t turn around as Trixie approached her. She’d taken refuge on the roof of the hospital and was leaning on the railings looking out over the horizon. Strictly speaking she shouldn’t be up here but it was New Years Eve and she was stuck at work working the night shift. She supposed it was only fair given she’d had the entirety of Christmas Day off but it didn’t mean she wasn’t longing for her wife and child. She’d barely seen Delia - the Welsh woman had worked the day shift and after a quick peck on the cheek and handing over Emilee, she’d had to dash off to assist on a birth.  

She wasn’t surprised Trixie had found her. This had always been their secret refuge ever since their student days. Back then it had been a good hiding place for Trixie and her various boyfriends, a great place for Patsy to chain smoke cigarettes away from everyone else and a place for both of them to hide out away from the world. It had become a New Years tradition to sneak up here just before midnight with their ‘New Year’s Kiss’ - for Patsy that had always been Delia but Trixie had at one point delighted in finding some young dashing doctor, nurse or paramedic to drag up here. 

“Do you ever think about the fact it’s 2018 already somewhere else in the world?” Patsy asked quietly. 

“The only thoughts I currently have Patsy are how I can possibly escape this shift.” Trixie chuckled, “I suppose it is a little crazy though.” 

“And that if someone died right now in say, Hong Kong, they’d have died in 2018?” Patsy took a deep drag of her cigarette. “Yet, it’s still 2017 here.”

“That’s a rather morbid thought.” Trixie commented as she lit her own cigarette. “Is this to do with your Father?” 

Patsy didn’t say anything, simply blew out the smoke she’d been holding. 

“It’s just with you mentioning Hong Kong…” Trixie trailed off.

“He wrote to me… well his Nurse did.” Patsy admitted, “He’s dying. Wants me to go back.”

“And?”

“And that’s it.” Patsy shrugged, stubbing her cigarette out into a tray that she and Trixie had put up there years ago. 

“What does Delia say?”

“She doesn’t have to say.” Patsy sighed, “I know she thinks I should go.”

“Why?” Trixie frowned.

“She places value on family.” Patsy shrugged, “She always has done.” Patsy took a breath, “She’s been incredible though… I can’t pretend she hasn’t.” 

“Of course she has, she’s Delia.” Trixie chuckled. “Have you spoken to her about it?”

“Why is that always your advice? That and cleaning?” 

“Does my advice work?” 

“Yes.” Patsy admitted grumpily.

“Well then.” Trixie puffed her chest out jokingly, “So, what’s your better half doing?” 

“Her Mother’s over.” Patsy grumbled, “and her Dad but I can deal with Dai. Enid makes me almost glad I’m here.” 

“No midnight kiss up here though.” Trixie winked, “Christopher has taken Alexandra into London so she can watch the fireworks.”

“So no chance of a midnight kiss either?” Patsy teased.

“Well I’m not kissing you.” Trixie replied, enjoying the easy banter with her best friend.

“I’m wounded.” Patsy clutched her chest dramatically. 

Just as Trixie was about to reply, fireworks began to litter the sky. Patsy checked her watch and shrugged. 

“Well that’s it. 2018 is upon us.” Patsy smiled. “Happy New Year Trix.” 

“Happy New Year sweetie.” Trixie responded wrapping her arms around her best friend, “Now let’s get back inside, the sooner this shift is over the sooner we get our first snogs of 2018!” 

—

Patsy rolled her shoulders tiredly as she locked the front door behind her. After her skiving session with Trixie that saw in the New Year, she’d not stopped. It seemed that everyone wanted their baby born in 2018 as all the babies had seemed to have come at once. Maybe it was the hope of the New Year not being quite as fucked - after all 2017 had been a true shit storm. In truth, the red head didn’t hold much hope for 2018 either. It was the same every year - hope, hope and more hope. By February everyone would be just as pessimistic as she was. 

She popped her head around Emilee’s door, smiling as she noticed her daughter fast asleep. She closed the door quietly, careful not to disturb Emilee or Delia’s parents who were sleeping upon the sofa-bed. She slipped into her own room undressing as quickly as she could into her pyjamas. It was five in the morning - once of a day she and Delia would have only just been rolling in. She shook her head at the thought, that would never happen now - especially not with Emilee. Gosh, they’d grown up a lot. 

Patsy crawled into bed beside her sleeping wife, throwing an arm over her. She grinned as Delia rolled over sleepily.

“Pats?” 

“Well who else do you think is sneaking into your bed?” Patsy teased, “You got a secret woman, Busby?” 

“You’ve caught me out.” Delia mumbled, “You don’t mind do you?”

“Not a bit.” Patsy replied. 

Delia’s eyes opened at that as she playfully slapped Patsy’s arm, “You’re meant to say you’re wild with jealousy!” 

“I would be if there was a shred of truth in it.” Patsy responded, “Why would you need a secret woman when you have the absolute delight that is me?” 

Delia hummed in response, “I suppose you’re alright.”

“The highest compliment.” Patsy exclaimed dramatically.

“How was your shift?” Delia asked.

“Torturous.” 

“Did you sneak up onto the roof?” Delia asked.

“I did.”

“Have yourself a New Year snog did you?” Delia teased.

“Trixie wasn’t game I’m afraid.” Patsy whispered, “Besides, there’s only one woman I wanted to snog and she’s lying right beside me.” 

“Best get on with it then. You’re five hours late.” 

Patsy swooped down and kissed Delia firmly. As she pulled away she ran her hand down Delia’s face.

“Better late than never, darling.” Patsy winked, “Happy New Year.” 

“Happy New Year, Pats.” Delia responded, “Now…” She grinned pulling her wife closer, “Sleep.” 

Patsy snuggled in closer to wife. Sleep sounded perfect.

—

“Do not tell your Mam… or your Grandma for that matter.” 

Emilee nodded enthusiastically as Dai Busby set the chocolate covered pancakes down in front of her. She began to attack them with her plastic knife and fork, humming with each bite. Dai glanced nervously towards the rest of the flat. He knew that he would be in trouble if any of the women currently sleeping awoke and found him indulging his granddaughter in such an unhealthy breakfast but he couldn’t help it. Just like Delia had been when she was that age he found her impossible to say no to and when she’d asked for ‘Grandad Busby’s Special Pancakes’ - well who had he been to say no?

“This is the best breakfast ever!” Emilee beamed. “Mam makes me have toast or porridge and fruit.” 

“And what about Mummy?”

Emilee smirked slightly and beckoned her Grandad closer, a secret about to be told. “Mummy gives me the same but sometimes she lets me have Coco Pops and sometimes… sometimes she makes pancakes with loads of sugar on them but we can’t tell Mam.”

Dai laughed as Emilee put one finger to her lips. Surprisingly it didn’t shock him to learn that Patsy sometimes bent the rules a little bit. He knew that beneath all that bravado and authority she was an utter marshmallow and completely under her daughter’s spell. He also knew exactly what his own daughter was like and he knew that she would undoubtedly be the stricter of the two. Although he’d never say it to Delia, she was more like her Mother than she would probably care to be and when he heard her telling Emilee in no uncertain terms it was bedtime the previous evening, he had been transported back twenty years when Enid had said the same words to her. 

“I’ll keep your secret.” Dai winked. 

“What secret?” 

Dai winced as he heard Delia’s voice. 

“Mam, it’s a secret!” Emilee exclaimed, “We can’t tell you because then it wouldn’t be a secret.” 

“And what exactly is that you’re eating?” Delia asked making her way over.

“Secret.” Emilee grinned cheekily as she shoved the last piece of pancake into her mouth. 

“Hmm.” Delia raised her eyebrows before moving around her daughter and towards the kettle. “Morning Dad.”

“Morning cariad.” He responded. 

“Been making your pancakes again?” She asked.

“It’s very hard saying no to a miniature version of you.” Dai admitted with a chuckle. 

“Maybe in looks but she’s every bit Patsy’s daughter in mannerisms.” Delia smiled. “Although maybe not quite as stubborn.” 

Dai frowned slightly at the tone of Delia’s voice. He’d had a feeling that there was something unspoken simmering beneath the surface when he’d arrived and now, with Delia’s tone and her choice of words, he was positive of it. 

“What’s wrong Delia?” He asked.

“It’s nothing.” Delia responded, her eyes flitting to Emilee. 

Dai, realising that Delia wasn’t going to speak about whatever it was with her daughter present turned to his granddaughter. 

“Em, why don’t you go wake your Grandma up and get her to put the tele on for you?” Dai suggested, his voice low and playful. Em nodded excitedly, dashing off. He smiled as he heard her waking Enid up before turning to Delia. “What is it?” 

“You can’t tell Patsy I told you.” Delia started, “but she had a letter from her Father… well his Nurse.” She took a moment before continuing, “you know she's completely cut him off but he’s dying Dad, and she won’t do anything about it. She won’t go to him, she won’t write to him and… I’m just worried about her. I’m scared she’s going to regret not reconciling with him whilst she had the chance.” 

Dai took a moment. He didn’t have much time for Charles Mount - granted he’d never met the man but from all he’d heard he couldn’t imagine they’d get on. He couldn’t fathom how anyone could abandon their daughter in the way he had, especially not one as wonderful as Patsy. Dai had a great deal of time for his daughter in law and he hated that she’d had to go through so much so young. He could see Delia eyeing him - his silence it seemed had dragged on a little too long. 

“Delia, have you considered that maybe she’s scared too?” Dai asked softly, “Scared to see a man who she doesn’t really know? Scared to lose the last member of her ‘blood’ family?” 

“She’ll never admit to it.” 

“Give her time.” The older man advised.

“But what if there isn’t time?” 

“You know her better than anyone, cariad.” Dai shrugged, “But sometimes we have to let those we love find their own way and just be there for them regardless of the outcome. She’ll work it out… and so will you.” 

Delia nodded. Maybe her Dad was right.

—

Emilee crept slowly towards her parents’ bedroom. Waking Grandma up had been fun but eventually the older woman had wanted to get some tea and breakfast and so the youngster had been left alone to watch TV. However, Emilee had decided she didn’t want to watch TV. It was a whole new year and she wanted to see her Mummy. Mam had let her stay up late, way past midnight, but Mummy still hadn’t been home when she’d had to go to bed. Now, it was morning and Emilee wanted to do what all the adults had done last night and wish her a ‘Happy New Year’. 

She slowly tiptoed over to the bed, clambering onto it and snuggling up close to Patsy who was still lightly sleeping. She grinned as she felt Patsy’s arm wrap around her. She lay there for a moment, enjoying the hug before whispering:

“Are you awake Mummy?” 

“Yes.” Patsy mumbled.

“Are you tired?” 

“Yes.” 

“Do you want to go back to sleep?” 

Patsy finally opened her eyes and smiled at her daughter’s thoughtfulness. “No, darling. Although that doesn’t mean I want to get up.” She winked. “Shall we hide in here for a bit longer before your Mam makes us all go for a walk?” 

Emilee bit her lip and nodded, wrapping her arms even tighter around Patsy. Patsy smiled and pressed a kiss to her daughter’s head. This was her idea of the perfect morning - well, maybe it was missing Delia but snuggles with her daughter were every bit as special. 

“Mummy?”

Patsy hummed.

“Happy New Year.” The young girl grinned. 

“Happy New Year, sweetheart.” Patsy responded, “Did Mam let you stay up late?”

“Yep, even past midnight!” 

“Wow!” 

“And she did this funny dance in this funny language.” 

Patsy chucked, “Do you mean Auld Lang Syne?” 

“Maybe.” 

Patsy chuckled. 

“Did you sing at work?” 

“No.” Patsy smiled, “I was busy.” 

“Is that why you’re sad?” 

“What makes you think I’m sad?” Patsy asked quietly. 

“Dunno. Just do.” Em replied.

“Well I could never be sad.” Patsy whispered, “Not with you here.” 

“Cuddles make me feel better. Do they make you feel better?” 

“They do.” 

“Good.” Emilee grinned, “Because I love you lots.”

“I love you lots too.” Patsy responded, her heart warming at her daughter’s declaration. 

“Like jelly tots?!”

“Like jelly tots.” Patsy confirmed. 

Patsy smiled as she felt Emilee try and snuggle closer to her. She gave her a slight squeeze before relaxing. They lay like that for some time, content to simply snuggle together and doze. It was only when the door opened that Patsy reopened her eyes. She smiled as she noticed Delia stood with a lopsided smile upon her face. She beckoned her wife over with her free arm.

Delia slowly made her way over to her wife and child. She’d come in search of Emilee to get her ready but the lure of the two most important people in her life was too much. When she’d first entered the room, she was almost sure her heart had skipped a beat. The simple sight of Patsy and Emilee together never failed to bring a smile to her face. As she lowered down onto the bed, Patsy outstretched one arm pulling her towards her. Emilee rolled over and smiled up at Delia, happy to be cocooned between her Mothers. 

“I wondered where you’d got to.” Delia smiled down at Emilee. 

“I wanted to wish Mummy a ‘Happy New Year’.” The young girl replied.

“And have you?” Delia asked.

“Yes. Then we decided that we were going to hide.” Emilee giggled.

“Did you now?” Delia smirked. 

“The New Years Walk is coming isn’t it?” Patsy asked dramatically. 

“You enjoy it.” Delia responded with a knowing smirk.

“I enjoy it when I don’t have to be on my best behaviour.” Patsy drawled. She sighed as she saw the look in Delia’s eyes and gently ran a hand down her wife’s arm, “I’m sorry, I’m just tired.”

“You don’t have to come, Pats.” Delia said softly. At Patsy’s raised eyebrows she continued, “and never mind what my Mam might have to say - you were up all night delivering babies.” 

Patsy smiled at Delia’s thoughtfulness and shook her head, “Stop being so nice to me. I’m being a real grouch and you’re being all understanding - it’s making me feel incredibly guilty.” 

“It’s part of my master plan.” Delia wiggled her eyebrows.

“What to guilt trip me into going?” Patsy asked. Delia simply winked, “well you’ll be pleased to know it’s worked.” She tickled Emilee as she propped herself up on arm, “Come on you, time to get ready.”

“Can we play on the swings?” Emilee asked, smiling her sweetest smile. 

“Yes.” Delia chuckled.

Within seconds Emilee was up and running out the room, whooping. Patsy and Delia glanced at one another before laughing. Delia patted Patsy’s knee before standing up,

“Come on, sooner you get dressed, the sooner you can play on the swings.” 

Patsy rolled her eyes as Delia left and stretched, standing up as she did so. She could hear Dai chuckling and sighed. She wondered what her own Father was doing before shaking her head, she wasn’t going to think about him, not today. No, today was for her family - the people who were there day in, day out, who she loved and was loved by. It was for playing on the swings with Emilee, sharing knowing looks with Delia and fighting the urge to roll her eyes every time Enid Busby opened her mouth. It was not for the man who abandoned her, it was not for the man who hadn’t shown an interest in her life, it was not for the man who suddenly demanded she return to him. It was a new year but that didn’t mean it was a new beginning. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this has taken me so long to post... I've made it a long chapter to apologise. Work has been crazy. Thanks to everyone who is reading this and especially to those of you leaving kudos and comments - they make my day :) 
> 
> Happy CTM day everyone - let's hope there's another postcard!


	5. Into the Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Delia drags Patsy into the woods and Dai Busby proves his the MVP.

“Alright?” 

Patsy smiled down at Delia as the younger woman came to stand beside her. Dai was currently pushing Emilee on a swing as Enid hovered telling him to be careful how high he pushed her. Patsy had been watching, her eyes fixated on the happy scene before her. She’d felt a slight pull in her chest when she realised she couldn’t really remember doing this as a child. Her memories of her Mother and Sister seemed so faded now - little snippets as opposed to full episodes. Moments of significance as opposed to the every day little things. Her memories after the accident consisted mainly of boarding school and how God awful it was. 

“Come on.” Delia took her hand, “they’ll be fine for a few moments.” 

“Dragging me off into the woods, Busby?” Patsy murmured, “with your Mother just over there? Tut tut.” 

“I want to have a few moments alone with my wife, surely that’s not too much to ask for?” 

Patsy bit her lip and allowed Delia to pull her away. They were silent as the walked amongst the trees. The only sound was the dead leaves crunching beneath their feet, branches snapping as she stood on them and the ruffling of their thick coats. Delia eventually brought them to a halt alongside a fallen tree. She sat Patsy down before pushing the redheads legs apart and standing between them, her arms wrapping around her love’s neck. Patsy sighed and let her arms loosely loop around Delia’s waist. 

“I don’t want to talk about it Deels, not today.” Patsy whispered, her eyes down, “I want today to be about you, about Em, about your parents.” 

“I didn’t bring you here to talk about your Father, Pats.” Delia responded, “I brought you here so I can do this.” 

The Welsh woman leant down and captured Patsy’s lips in her own. The kiss grew heated quickly as Patsy moaned and pulled her wife closer. Delia pulled away as she felt Patsy’s hands begin to roam - she knew that it wouldn’t be long before Emilee noticed their absence and they’d have to make their way back or be found. She gently ran a hand down Patsy’s cheek, pressing one last chaste kiss to her wife’s lips.

“Still hiding me from your parents… really Deels, I thought we’d moved on from this.” Patsy teased.

“That was once.” 

“A rather unforgettable once.” Patsy responded huskily. 

Delia couldn’t help but blush. It had been the second time she’d taken Patsy home - her Mother had set up the guest bedroom for Patsy and had been watching them like a hawk. They’d been back for her cousin’s wedding and the next day, despite the fact Delia and Patsy were hungover, her Mother had insisted on them all having tea outside in the garden. It had been a torturous couple of days for the young couple with no contact and with Enid cooking in the kitchen and shouting at Dai, Delia had taken advantage and dragged Patsy down to the woods at the back of her parents’ cottage. They’d made up for the lost time and Patsy had smirked throughout dinner - so much so that Enid had congratulated herself on giving Patsy such a good time. The redhead had nearly choked as Delia bit her lip to halt her giggles.

“Mam still thinks it was her excellent hosting skills that had you smiling through dinner.” 

“‘There’s nothing like eating some good quality food to put a smile on your face’” Patsy imitated Mrs Busby, “if only she knew what I’d actually been eating.”

“Pats!” Delia exclaimed, shocked at Patsy’s daring and risqué comment. 

“Don’t act the innocent with me, Busby.” Patsy smiled. She took a breath before looking into her wife’s eyes once more, “I know I said I didn’t want to talk about my Father and I don’t… but…”

“Pats you don’t owe me an explanation.” 

“But I do, Deels. You’re my wife. We have a child. I can’t pretend that this is all about me… and as much as I want too… I can’t just pretend that letter never came.” Patsy took a moment, “I guess what I’m trying to say is that… I will talk to you about it… just not today.”

“You’re not alone.” Delia promised.

“No, I’m not.” Patsy grinned. “Although I think I might be in my decision…”

“It’s your choice, cariad.” Delia sighed, “Whether I or anyone else agrees with it doesn't really matter. It has to be your choice.” 

“What did I do to deserve you?” Patsy murmured. 

“You must have been a saint in another life.” Delia winked, stepping away and allowing Patsy to stand up, an unspoken decision to head back made between them. 

Patsy took Delia’s hand and pulled her through the woods back to the park. Upon spotting them Emilee bounced off the swing mid air (almost giving all the adults a heart attack) and ran over to her parents. She galloped towards them, giggling as Patsy and Delia bent down to her level.

“Having fun?” Patsy asked.

“Yeh but I’m bored of swings.” Emilee huffed. “I want to go on them.” 

Both Patsy and Delia looked over to where Emilee was pointing at the monkey bars. Patsy chuckled.

“Like mother like daughter…” 

Delia pulled a face before standing up and taking Emilee’s hand. They rushed over to the monkey bars. Emilee watching in amazement (and Patsy watching in a less than innocent delight) as Delia showed the youngster her own skills. Patsy chuckled as Delia lifted Emilee up onto her first one, smiling as her wife gently coaxed her into taking one hand off the bar and placing it onto the next one. She was so caught up in the scene that she didn't notice Dai Busby slide up beside her. 

“You’d think she’d grow out of playing on monkey bars.”

“Never.” Patsy hummed, “Especially not now she has the excuse of ‘teaching Emilee’” 

Dai chuckled. He chanced a glance at his daughter-in-law. She looked tired, he thought to himself. He shuffled awkwardly for a second, unsure of how to offer his support without scaring the taller woman away. He knew that Delia had asked him not to mention it and he wouldn’t - but that didn’t mean he couldn’t offer his love. 

“Do you not fancy it yourself Patsy?” He asked.

“Not a bit.” The redhead chuckled, “I’m content standing here hoping beyond all hope neither of them break something.” 

“Least you’d know what to do,” Dai winked, “still, they’re more resilient than you think you know.”

“Something tells me we aren’t still taking about monkey bars.” Patsy murmured, shoving her hands into her pockets. 

“I’m not one to be cryptic, Patsy.” Dai shrugged, “and I know you are straight talking woman and so I won’t insult you by pretending otherwise.” He took a moment, “You’re not alone, cariad. None of you are, and none you ever will be.” He cleared his throat, “No matter where life takes you Patsy, you’ll be alright.” 

Patsy swallowed, nodding but not turning to look at her Father-in-Law. Dai was a man of few words and she’d always admired that about him, but he was also caring, endlessly compassionate and when it came down to it, the ultimate support and his words had brought tears to eyes. It also seemed fitting, that he'd spoken almost the exact same words as her wife.

“Thank you.” She whispered, her hand reaching out to take his briefly. 

Dai nodded, unsure of what else to say, he squeezed her hand before letting it go.

“Who’s for a teacake?” 

Patsy and Dai smiled - both unusually glad for Enid Busby’s intrusion. They shared a smile, chuckling as they saw Emilee drop off the monkey bars and gallop past them, a windswept Delia in tow. Patsy sighed, if only things could stay like this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this has taken me so long to upload. I've been a mix of busy and monstrously ill. I'll catch up on all your wonderful stories now I'm back though. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter - we're going to skip ahead a little in the next chapter as it becomes clearer Patsy needs to make her decision...


	6. Cleaning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the going gets tough, the Patsy gets cleaning (and Delia is a babe as per)

“And as such if we could limit our visits to patients to just fifteen minutes we could increase efficiency ten fold.”

Patsy grit her teeth as she listened to Ursula lecture her and her staff. The hospital, on a money saving drive, had sent her in to ‘help’ with their administration. She’d been there just a day and had already managed to suck the life and soul out of the ward. Everyone was on edge - rushing aimlessly to try and stick to Ursula’s regime.

“Sometimes Mothers require longer.” Phyllis spoke up, “We must be thorough.”

“Nurse Crane, you are aware of the strain the NHS is under?” Ursula began but was swiftly cut off-

“More than. But I do believe we’d be putting more strain on our services if we happen to rush our examinations and miss something life threatening.” The Northern nurse continued, “A little time in prevention saves a lot of hassle further down the line.”

“In the odd cases where there is an issue.”

Patsy shook her head.

“And what about at clinic?” Patsy snapped, “And how about when our Mothers are in labour? Are we to leave after fifteen minutes regardless of the progress?” She huffed, “You’re making this out to be rather black and white - babies don’t follow schedules… I’m not sure how it’s possible that we can.”

“Then you must find out, Dr Mount.” Ursula snapped. “Dr Turner, I wish to speak to you about your involvement in Nurse Turner’s cases. The rest of you may go.”

Patsy stormed off, pushing the door so hard it slammed against the wall. Delia took a breath, a worried expression flittering across her features. She was about to rush after her wife when Val slid up to her, bumping her with her shoulder.

“Come on, we’ve got clinic… and I don’t much fancy being late with your wife in the mood she’s in!”

Delia sighed and nodded. This was the last thing Patsy needed and something told her, it wasn’t going to end well.

—

Patsy closed her eyes as she gripped the desk, breathing in and breathing out as mindfully as she could. Today had been hard. With Ursula’s ridiculous regime followed by a gruelling clinic she wanted nothing more than to crawl into a hole. She’d just seen Penny Reed - and had to explain to her the implications of her pregnancy, the risks involved for a woman with restricted growth. It wasn’t fair, Patsy thought, Penny Reed deserved a happy, healthy pregnancy with no concerns other than getting a nursery ready and yet, here they were.

She heard a knock at her door and groaned. She’d come to her office to seek refuge - just for five minutes. She wondered for a moment whether she could get away with pretending she wasn’t in but the better part of her won out and she called for the visitor to enter. She was glad she did when she noticed Delia sneak in. The smaller woman walked steadily over, wrapping her arms around Patsy from behind. Patsy closed her eyes, happily this time, as she felt Delia’s warmth against her back. Always there, always grounding her.

“I love you.” Delia whispered.

Patsy turned and perched on the edge of her desk, pulling Delia towards her. The Welsh woman wrapped her arms lazily around Patsy’s neck before leaning down and capturing Patsy’s lips with her own.

“You alright?” Delia asked quietly.

“I am now.” Patsy murmured, “I guess I’m just struggling with Ursula being here. It feels a little like they’re saying our ward isn’t good enough-“

“Pats.”

“And I know it’s not that but… she’s changing things and… she’s making everything worse.” Patsy grumbled. “You better not let her catch you in here.”

“Why?” Delia frowned.

“She’s told Patrick and Shelagh they can’t work together.” Patsy huffed, “As though there’s always the time to come and find me or find another Nurse. She’s clueless.”

“That won’t last. Anyway, I’m taking my break and I just so happen to be spending it with my wife. She can’t stop us spending our breaks together.”

“I’m not on a break though. I’m just hiding.” Patsy admitted.

“I bet you haven’t had a single break today. You’re having a break.” Delia decided, “Don’t let her run you into the ground Pats, or get you down. Now, take five minutes more.”

“How long have you got left?”

“Five minutes.” Delia winked.

“Come here.” Patsy sighed pulling Delia to her and into a warm embrace. She buried her head into Delia’s shoulder, smiling as she felt the tension leave her the moment Delia began rubbing small circles across her back.

They remained locked in their embrace for the full five minutes before Delia gently pulled away, her hands running down Patsy’s cheeks. Patsy raised her own hands, cupping Delia’s face and pulling her down for a sweet, chaste kiss.

“I need to go.” Delia whispered.

“I know.” Patsy hummed, “I love you.”

Delia grinned before backing out of her wife’s embrace.

“See you when I get home.”

Patsy nodded with a smile before standing up. She was about to move off when she heard her phone ding - alerting her to an email. She grumbled, fishing it out to silence it when she noticed the subject line, the sender… she stared at it for a moment before re-locking her phone and putting it on silent… she didn’t have time for that… not now.

—

“But where’s Mummy?”

Delia sighed as Emilee sat up in bed once again. It was already an hour past her bedtime and Patsy still hadn’t returned home. She’d expected her wife home a couple of hours ago but a quick call to the hospital had confirmed that Patsy had been dragged in to one of Shelagh’s births despite the fact she’d already worked long past her shift end. The Welsh woman cursed Ursula for her stupid new rules and wondered how long it would be before she and Patsy were dragged into her office and given the same dressing down. For now though, her main concern was trying to get her daughter off to sleep. Emilee was generally well behaved and used to only one of her parents being there to put her to bed, but like all children, when the mood struck her she could be stubborn and unrelenting.

“I’ve told you sweetheart, she’s at work.”

“But she was at work this morning.” Emilee huffed.

“And she’s still at work.” Delia breathed, her tone slightly sharper than before.

“Want to see her.”

“Well then,” Delia snapped, “the sooner you get to sleep, the sooner it’ll be morning and the sooner you’ll see her.”

Emilee huffed, crossing her arms and flopping back down onto her bed. Delia sighed, kissing her daughter’s forehead despite the youngster turning over with a scowl across her face. She turned with yet another sigh walking out of the room and closing the door behind her. She glanced at the clock… Patsy had been out of the house since early this morning and she knew that the red head was due back in work early tomorrow morning too. Delia shook her head sadly and made her way to her own bedroom… one of them needed to get some rest at least.

However, a couple of hours later Delia was awoken. She noted that Patsy’s phone was charging on the bedside cabinet but her wife was nowhere to be seen. She grumbled, rolling over and pressing the ‘Home’ button to glance at the time… however, Patsy had evidently left the phone unlocked and the first thing that popped up on screen was an email from her Father’s nurse. Delia took a breath, there was no unseeing the words ‘come home’.

The Welsh woman climbed out of bed and pulled her dressing gown on before slowly making her way downstairs. She could see light coming from the kitchen and sighed as she heard the tell tale signs of Patsy scrubbing the surfaces. She wandered slowly to the opening, stopping for a moment before moving towards her wife who was in a trance like state. Slowly, she made her presence known with a gentle clearing of her throat.

“Come to bed Pats.” Delia whispered.

Patsy ignored her continuing to scrub.

“Patsy.”

“I’m cleaning.”

“It’s almost midnight and you’ve been awake since before six.”

“I’m almost finished.” Patsy retorted.

Delia took a breath. “I’ve seen the email.”

That stopped Patsy in her tracks.

“I wondered what time it was… you hadn’t locked your phone.” Delia continued, “Patsy… you need to go to him.”

“He’s dying.” Patsy said slamming her sponge down on the counter top and finally turning to face Delia, “I can’t save him.”

“You can help him though.” Delia swallowed.

“I’m not leaving you… or Emilee.” Patsy responded.

“Who says you have to?” Delia asked, taking a step closer.

“I’d be there for months, Delia.” Patsy sighed, “We couldn’t just uproot Em. We couldn't just pretend we don’t have bills and a mortgage to pay. This isn’t as simple as just me going away. It’s not just about me and you. We have Em and she comes first.”

“You need to see him, Pats. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

Patsy shook her head.

“I’m good at my jobs Deels, I’m good at being your wife, I’m good at being Em’s Mum… but losing someone? Nope… not very good at that… and either way… I lose someone.”

Delia knelt down on the floor and pulled Patsy to her, “You’ll never lose me cariad, and you’ll never lose Em…”

Patsy allowed herself to be held, her silent tears seeping into Delia’s shoulder. She felt safe in Delia’s arms. It felt as though the Welsh woman was holding her entire being together, stopping the conflict that was raging within her from splitting her in two. It was Delia who eventually pulled away, standing up and pulling the red head up with her.

“Come on, let’s go to bed. All of this can wait.” Delia smiled.

Patsy nodded and allowed herself to be led away to their bedroom… but she thought Delia was wrong… none of this could wait, no matter how much she might want it to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi I'm alive 
> 
> Just incredibly busy and useless at posting this.
> 
> I'm now off to try and read everything I've missed! 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed... and you're still reading... and I'll try and be better at updating!


	7. It's Not Unusual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A double whammy for you... 
> 
> Patsy finds her heart strings tugged, Emilee is suitably sassy, Ursula is a dick and Delia is a babe...

Patsy stood watching as Emilee ate her breakfast. She couldn’t take her eyes off of her daughter, she sighed, her chest feeling like it was going to burst with the amount of love she felt in that moment. She wondered if her Father had ever felt like this when she was little. She wondered if he’d stood and watched her and Grace doing something as mundane as eating breakfast and been consumed by an overwhelming, unconditional love?

“Pats, are you sure you’re ok if I head off?” Delia asked as she threw her coat on.

“Delia, you really don’t need to get the bus.” Patsy sighed, “I can take you.”

“I’ll be late.” Delia shook her head.

“I say it’s ok.”

“It’s not your wrath I’m afraid of!” Delia responded, pressing a kiss to Emilee’s head.

“But we always just come in together… Julienne always put us on to start at the same time if we were doing a similar shift.” Patsy huffed.

“Yes, well, Julienne is no longer in charge.” Delia reminded sliding up to Patsy and giving her a chaste kiss, “I’ll see you on the ward.”

“In less than an hour.” Patsy promised. “Give my love to the 43!”

Delia narrowed her eyes before dashing out of the house. Patsy shook her head as she turned and began readying both her own bag and Emilee’s. She smiled as she saw Emilee walk up beside her with her plate and drop it in the sink.

“Mummy.” Emilee murmured, “Why do I have to go to nursery?”

“Because it’s where you learn sweetheart.” Patsy responded.

“Why do I have to learn?”

Patsy rolled her eyes, it seemed today was a ‘why’ day.

“Because everyone needs to learn.” 

“Do you learn?”

“Everyday.” Patsy smiled. “You never stop learning Em.”

“Can’t I come learn with you then?”

Patsy smiled wistfully… she should have known better. Emilee was far too clever to let that one slip.

“No sweetheart. You see, learning has to be done in stages…” Patsy thought for a moment, “And it’s a little like your games where you have to complete one level to move on to the next one.”

“Oh.”

Patsy frowned slightly at her daughter’s tone.

“I want to spend the day with you though.”

Oh, indeed. Patsy swallowed and bent down to Emilee’s level. The young girl was gazing down at the floor, evidently slightly embarrassed. Patsy hummed, gently lifting Em’s chin so she could look her in the eyes.

“And I’d much rather spend the day with you but hey, we can spend the evening together… in fact we could go to Gilly’s Parlour and get pancakes and ice cream” Patsy promised.

“With Mam too?” Emilee asked her eyes lighting up.

“With Mam too.” Patsy smiled. “Now come on, let’s get going.”

Emilee grinned before galloping off to get her shoes and coat on. Patsy stood and closed her eyes. Suddenly her phone felt heavy sat in her pocket. She couldn’t keep pretending that this was all going to go away no matter how much she pretended (and told herself and Delia) that it would. Delia had accused her of making light of everything when she’d refused to discuss it any further last night in bed. The problem was if she didn’t make light of it, if she did allow herself to think about it, she wasn’t sure she could handle it. It was evident that Emilee was feeling the effects of her increasing work schedule - could she really justify spending any time away from her? It was all very well Delia saying that Emilee was young enough to not know any better than going to Hong Kong but it just wasn’t practical and besides, Patsy was not leaving either of them.

When had her Father ever been there for her? What exactly did she owe him? Nothing.

“Mummy…”

Patsy chuckled as she noticed Emilee with her jumper on back to front and her coat on upside down. She shook her head as she righted the clothing mishaps. This was her life now… and she was happy with it.

————

“You show exemplary care to all your patients, going above and beyond what is necessary.”

Delia felt herself grinning at Ursula’s words, in fact, she noted that everyone was grinning, even Patsy who up until this point had been scowling, evidently put out at being called for yet another meeting. Their eyes met across the room briefly before darting back to Ursula as she continued to speak.

“But I’m not entirely convinced it’s efficient and we really must be above all else efficient. From now on, I expect you all to only do what is expected of you and what your job demands. You are doctors, nurses and midwives, you are not maids.” Ursula snarled, “We must be fit for the modern world…”

Patsy’s face was thunderous. The entire group looked like they’d been slapped. Delia watched as Ursula left, all smug and victorious. Phyllis, to her credit, was the first to recover demanding everyone return to whatever they were doing and crack on with patients.

“But I was meant to be taking Janine to the ICU to see her husband.” Winifred whined.

“That would verge into extra-curricular territory I’m afraid, Winifred.” Phyllis sighed.

“And travel visas there have been cancelled.” Patsy responded sarcastically. “Just take the poor woman.”

“Dr Mount-“

“We pride ourselves on the care we provide. If a trip to the ICU to see her critically ill husband would help Janine then that’s that.” Patsy shrugged, “I do believe that she’s under my care… I instruct you to do it, Winifred.”

“But you’ll get in trouble…”

“Who cares.” Patsy said with an exasperated sigh before storming off down the corridor.

Delia sighed, shrugging her shoulders as Winifred looked at her expectantly. Phyllis frowned, waving Winifred off before moving closer to the Welsh woman.

“Is everything alright lass?”

“Patsy has a lot on her mind.” Delia admitted, “This isn’t helping.”

“She’s going to get herself into trouble.” Phyllis sighed worriedly.

“I’ll be honest with you, Phyllis. If this chat is to try and get me to talk some sense into her you’re wasting your time…” Delia trailed off, “The last thing Patsy will care about right now is pandering to Ursula.”

“I’ve known her… and you… a long time… I don’t want to see years of hard work go down the drain.” Phyllis commented, “But I also know when to leave well alone…”

Delia nodded gratefully. Patsy needed to come to terms with what she was going to do in regards to her father’s health… and soon.

 

 

\---------

 

“Patsy, I don’t want to argue with you.”

“Then don’t.”

Delia rolled her eyes as Patsy pulled into the nursery car park. She waited, not moving even when Patsy cut the engine off. The redhead turned, petulant as she felt her wife’s eyes upon her.

“Delia, are you going to sit and stare at me all evening or are you going to pick our daughter up?”

“You can be as antagonistic as you like Pats, it’s not going to work.” Delia said calmly, “You need to stop pretending that what’s happening with your Father is going to go away the more you ignore it.”

“I know that and I’m not.” Patsy snapped, “But I have more important things going on.”

“Like what?”

“Ursula.”

“Not buying.” Delia said as she unclipped her seatbelt, “Look, Phyllis is worried about you… I’m worried about you.”

“Well you don’t need to worry about me.” Patsy murmured turning away. 

“I just want what’s best for you, cariad.”

Patsy seemed to soften slightly at that, turning she smiled and gently took Delia’s hand. “I know you do… but right now, the best thing for me would be an evening having fun with my wife and daughter.”

Delia took a breath before deciding to call it day. She nodded, opening the door and heading off into the nursery. Patsy inhaled shakily as Delia disappeared inside, her elbows resting on the steering wheel as her head fell into her hands. She knew that Delia was right. She knew that Phyllis noticing meant it wouldn’t be long before Trixie noticed… then the rest of the ward. Still, it wasn’t simple and no matter how many times she made her mind up, she soon un-made it. She cursed her father and his innate ability to mess her life up. Why couldn’t he have been a more caring man? Why couldn’t he have shown a shred of interest in Delia and Emilee? If he had maybe this wouldn’t be so hard?

She sat back, smiling as she saw Delia and Emilee walking hand in hand back to the car. Emilee appeared to be carrying a picture in her other hand and as Delia approached, Patsy got out of the car, opening the rear door. As Delia lifted Emilee into the car, the youngster held her picture up to Patsy.

“Drew you and Mam a picture.” She grinned.

Patsy took it and felt tears well as she took in the picture. It was done in crayon and seemed to show her, Delia and Emilee eating ice creams. They all had big, beaming smiles upon their faces. It was the perfect family scene - care free, relaxed and filled with love.

“I love it.” Patsy responded, “We’ll pin it up when we get home.”

“Are we going for ice cream?” Emilee enthused.

“We certainly are!” Delia grinned back, “Right, let’s go.”

Patsy and Delia climbed back into their respective seats. Patsy reached across and squeezed her hand before starting the engine. A silent message of thanks, of apology and a promise that everything would be alright - or at least, she hoped it would.

—

Patsy sent a silent prayer of thanks as Emilee finally drifted off to sleep. Whilst ice cream had been a wonderful idea at the time, the sugar from the toppings had resulted in an extremely hyperactive four year old who had refused to go to bed. Delia had simply raised her eyebrows, an ‘I told you so’ expression flitting across her face - she’d warned Patsy at the parlour not to allow Emilee too many toppings but as always, Patsy had been won over by her daughter’s puppy dog eyes although she now vowed to grow some resistance to them.

“She’s asleep.” Patsy murmured to Delia who was sat on the sofa in a dinosaur onesie reading with music softly playing. Patsy noticed that their wedding song, _I Love How You Love Me_ by The Paris Sisters was playing. 

Patsy smiled, heart warmed by the sight and held her hand out to Delia who looked up, before placing her book down and allowing Patsy to pull her to her feet and into her arms. Delia allowed Patsy to gently sway with her, contented in that moment to pretend that everything was ok. Neither spoke, simply enjoyed the moment. The peace, the quiet, the domesticity. Delia sighed happily as her mind wandered back thinking of all the many years she’d spent with Patsy and how they’d changed… how Patsy had changed.

Delia remembered meeting Patsy and being instantly intrigued by the tall, then blonde, woman. She’d had such a presence, an air of authority and aloofness. Still, Delia hadn’t been cowed. Where everyone else found Patsy’s demeanour intimidating, she’d seen something else… she couldn’t tell you even now what it had been but she’d had this unbearable desire to get to know the woman behind the mask. And so, she’d talked to her, challenged her and eventually worn the taller woman down. Patsy often said she’d not taken much wearing down where Delia was concerned. Still, she’d not exactly been an open book. Over the years though that changed. Once Delia had discovered the warm, loveable and downright romantic Patsy, she’d been continuously surprised by the depth of her wife’s compassion. The prickly, sharp Pats of her youth had mellowed into a woman who open, who shared everything with her wife and allowed herself to be loved. Delia had forgotten how to deal with a closed off Patsy…

But this, allowing Patsy to take the lead… wasn’t this part of what she’d done? As their song came to an end, Patsy pressed her lips to Delia’s forehead, soft, tender and oh so loving. Delia was about to respond when Tom Jones’ _Not Unusual_ started playing. Both laughed, Patsy jokingly pulling Delia back to her and beginning to dance and sing the words quietly. Delia felt herself giggle, Playful Pats was evidently making an appearance…

“You really need to make use of playlists.” Patsy hummed as she spun Delia around.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Delia smirked.

“Where indeed?” She asked before pausing. She gently pushed a strand of Delia’s hair behind her ear, “I’m sorry for being a grump earlier.”

“You’re under a lot of pressure, Pats.” Delia returned gently.

“I shouldn’t take that out on you.” Patsy shook her head, “I feel like we’re having this conversation on an almost daily basis.” She took a moment, “I know I need to face up to what’s happening, Delia, really I do. But…”

“Pats.” Delia probed.

“‘Come Home’ - Hong Kong isn’t my home. Here with you and Em is home.” Patsy took a moment, “I know that’s what they’ll say though when I ring and… well that would mean either uprooting our entire family or leaving you and Em and so I’d prefer to just leave it all.”

“But you can’t…”

“I know.” Patsy sighed, “which is why I want to use our spa weekend this week. I need time to think… away from the hospital, Em, here… I just need to be alone with you…I love Em but she’s the entire reason I can’t think about this clearly. Every time I see her I just…”

Delia nodded saving Patsy from continuing, “I’ll book it now, you ask Trix if she fancies ‘Auntie’ duties.”

Both smiled at one another… it finally felt like they were getting somewhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the lovely warm welcome back guys :) 
> 
> I'm glad you're all still with me and enjoying this! 
> 
> Big Love to everyone in Manchester... whenever I walk through the city I always think about how much I love it, but I felt that love ten fold today. <3


	8. Penny Read

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penny Read gives birth... and Patsy is the one to give her the news.

Patsy shifted uncomfortably as she watched Julienne line up with the rest of them for Phyllis’ morning bulletin. Delia was away with Chummy delivering a pair of twins, Shelagh and Patrick were also absent and Ursula was nowhere to be seen, but everyone else was there. Phyllis was rattling off a list of babies that had been delivered over night and informing the team of the mothers expected to give birth today. Patsy was only half listening until she heard a familiar name…

“Mrs Reed, early labour, poor thing.”

“Did you say Penny Read?” Patsy jumped to attention. “I’ll go to her at once.”

“Doctor Mount…” Julienne said warily.

“I asked to be informed when Mrs Reed went into labour.” Patsy snapped, “I won’t let her go through this alone.” 

“There will be consequences.” Phyllis warned.

“Consequences be damned.” Patsy responded heartily, “The entire reason I came here was to go above and beyond for my patients… you’ve taught me that.” 

Julienne and Phyllis watched as she disappeared. The rest of the staff all smirking as Julienne proudly nodded.

“Good on her.” Phyllis breathed, “Right, the rest of you better crack on.”

—

As it turned out, Penny Read was already in theatre. All Patsy could do was hover outside nervously. Her head told her that she ought to go and do something useful - help another patient or at least catch up on some paperwork - but her heart kept her feet firmly planted to the floor. She didn’t know what it was about Penny Read that had touched her so much - maybe it was her endless hope and optimism - Patsy certainly envied that.

Her musings were interrupted by the sound of the door opening. She started as she noticed Delia leave still in scrubs - she had thought she’d been with Chummy. Patsy moved towards her instantly.

“Deels, I must know. Is Penny alright? Is baby?” 

“Penny is.” Delia smiled, “As for baby, I really don’t know Pats. I was too busy checking on Penny and baby was taken straight away.”

Patsy bit her lip, nodding before noticing Patrick leaving. She swallowed. “Patrick… the baby?”

“Perfectly well.” Patrick smiled, “And…” He paused for a moment, “No complications.”

Patsy gasped in relief, her hands clapping together and a smile spreading across her features.

“Would you like to be the one to inform Mrs Reed?” Patrick asked gently, “I’m afraid everything really was rather a blur and I wanted to get baby in some heat… anyway, everything finished up a little while ago so I’m sure she’ll be desperate to know.”

“I’d love to.” Patsy grinned. 

Patrick nodded. Delia waited for him to walk a little way down the corridor before turning to Patsy and gently squeezing her hand, fleeting but sincere, “See you later.” 

Patsy gave the slightest inclination of her head, a small smile directed at her wife before they parted. The redhead slowly made her way towards the ward where she knew Penny would be. She paused for a moment at the doors and simply looked in. It was a small ward with only four beds, all filled with women who’d had difficult or complicated births. She noticed that the other three women in the room were sleeping - only Penny was sat up - evidently awaiting news of her own little one. Patsy took a deep breath before walking in. Penny instantly turned to her, worry etched across her face. Patsy sat beside her and gently took her hand.

“Mrs Reed, you have a daughter.” Patsy beamed. She took a moment as she saw Penny gazing back at her in disbelief, “Your baby is well.” 

Patsy couldn’t help but share in Penny’s joy as she laughed, a huge grin breaking out across her face.

“She didn’t suffer?”

“No.” Patsy chuckled, “She’s… forgive the term but… normal sized.”

“You mean big?” 

Patsy nodded. She watched, heart full as Penny shook her head, the look of pure love and happiness upon her face reminding Patsy exactly why she did what she did. Her mind drifted back to Emilee’s birth - she knew that feeling oh so well. 

“What if we can’t manage her?”

Patsy startled as Penny continued.

“What if she can’t bare that we are dwarfs?” 

Patsy took a breath, “I’m a mother, Penny and I know what it’s like to worry and question yourself. To think that you aren’t capable or to think that you won’t be enough. To analyse every little shortcoming you’ve ever been through or had.” Patsy paused, unsure of how much further to go, she never ever revealed personal information to her patients but for some reason, Penny was different, “and I know what it is to have concerns over bonding. You see, I didn’t carry… that is… Delia, Nurse Busby I suppose to you, carried our child and even though I knew I wouldn’t have to carry a child to love them, I did wonder if I’d bond with her in quite the same way as Delia would. But those worries, Penny, were so utterly unfounded. Emilee doesn’t see any of it and they all evaporated the moment I held her in my arms.” 

“How old is she now?”

“Four.” Patsy smiled, “Going on fourteen.” 

“What if we can’t give her what she needs?” 

Patsy frowned before making another decision, “I also know what it is to be a child, to be afraid.” She paused, “I survived a terror attack you see, on the Tube… I was nine.”

“Oh.”

“I don’t speak about it much, to be honest, not many people know at all but when they do, they often ask were you afraid? And the answer was yes of course I was. But through all that horror? Through all that time awaiting rescue as people lay dying around me, not knowing if another attack was imminent, the only thing I was truly afraid of was losing my Mother - the woman who loved me beyond all of it… the fear, the horror, the pain… so please, Penny, do not doubt how much your child will love you and believe me, your child will see nothing of the things that bother you… or at least, very little.” 

“What happened?” 

“My Mother died… along with my Sister… their injuries were… severe.” 

“And your Father?”

“He wasn’t with us… we both struggled. We drifted apart but I think… I was so afraid of loss that I pushed him away and for a long time I closed my heart.” 

Patsy swallowed as she felt emotion creeping upon her, only raising her head when Penny took her hand, squeezing it gently. Patsy nodded with a sad smile.

“It’s never too late.” Penny whispered.

“Sorry, I’m afraid this has turned into a therapy session.”

“I appreciate all you’ve done for me…”

“Patsy.” Patsy cut in, “Please call me Patsy when no one else is around.”

“Very well.” 

“I should crack on but I’ll be sure to bring your daughter down to see you, along with your Husband, as soon as I’m able.” 

With one last squeeze of Penny’s hand Patsy left. She blindly walked along the corridor, stopping outside the ward prayer room. She looked around before dashing into it. She quickly unlocked her phone, opened her contacts and selected her Father’s number. She waited, chewing her finger, breathing heavy.

“Mount Residence.”

“It’s Patsy.”

“Miss Mount! You’re all your Father asks for…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm alive... 
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter while I attempt to read all your work I've missed while I have a rare afternoon off! :)


	9. Spare me a minute

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patsy makes a decision...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola. I'm alive. Have a chapter... and if you like it... thank Wheely_Jessi for reminding me I was writing this!

Delia chuckled as she felt Mr Reed hug her warmly. This, she thought was her favourite part of the job, handing out good news. After a promise to reunite him with his wife and child as soon as she was able, Delia left hopping down the corridor with a spring in her step. She was about to head to the Nurses’ Station to enquire with Phyllis as to when she might be able to take Mr Reed to his family when she saw a distraught looking Patsy walking towards her, her blue eyes swimming with unshed tears. Patsy walked straight towards her. 

“Are you busy?” Patsy swallowed, “That is, can you spare me half an hour?”

Delia found herself nodding as Patsy grabbed her hand and dragged her away from the ward. Delia allowed the redhead to lead her towards the escape up onto the roof, the taller woman turning the key and bundling Delia up the stairs. She had to let go of Delia’s hand to open the final door and walked out onto the roof top, sitting down on one of the raised metal platforms. Delia sat beside her, waiting patiently. 

“I’m going to Hong Kong.” Patsy managed to choke out. “I… I need to see him… to make things right.”

Delia nodded. She wanted to pull Patsy into her arms but waited, something told her that her wife wasn’t ready for that and that she had something else to say. So instead she asked an open ended question, one that would allow Patsy a multitude of options.

“How long for?”

“I’m not sure.” Patsy swallowed. “Which is why… I’m going alone.”

“Pats-“

“Please, Delia, hear me out.” Patsy croaked, “I can’t tell you how long I’m going for because I don’t know how it’s going to be and I want you to stay here with Emilee… well no, I don’t… I want you both to come with me but that is utterly selfish. I won’t uproot this entire family for him. This isn’t as simple as we’ll just go to Hong Kong for a few weeks… Emilee is starting her mornings at school and we have a house, bills to pay and… I want Emilee to be surrounded by love. Always, always by love. She has that here.”

“But she won’t have you.” Delia felt her own tears forming.

“She’ll always have me.” Patsy promised, “But I need to do this Deels, I need to see him. I need to try and put things right.”

“Don’t you want him to meet Em? To meet me? Before he…”

“More than anything.” Patsy nodded, “But I can’t promise he won’t be hostile and… it’s been twenty years… twenty years since I spent any longer than a couple of days in his company…”

“So that’s that. You just go to Hong Kong… leave me, leave Em…” Delia swallowed, “You expect Em to understand? To be ok with the fact you’re leaving and she won’t see you for God knows how long?”

“Delia, this is hard enough as it is. Please don’t make me feel like I’m abandoning Em.” 

“I just don’t see why we can’t come with you?”

“Because I need to do this alone.” Patsy admitted, “I need to… I need to be Patience Mount not Patsy Busby-Mount.” 

“She won’t understand.” 

“We can’t uproot her… he might not even last… look, you could come over in the holidays and there’s FaceTime?” Delia sniffed and Patsy grabbed her hands. “Please Deels.”

Delia nodded, her tears falling. Patsy too was crying by this point. Delia took a moment to compose herself.

“When will you go?”

“In a couple of weeks”

“You’ve made the bravest, most caring decision that you could and… despite this…” Delia gestured at her tears, “I’m proud of you Pats… I’m always so proud of you.” 

Patsy shakily nodded, her hand twitching. She wanted a cigarette so desperately but she wouldn’t do it. She wouldn’t fall back into the same old habits. 

“How will we manage it? You and I?” Patsy cried, “How will we survive the time and distance apart?”

“Pats… you’ve already mentioned FaceTime… there’s WhatsApp… and we’re married. We’re strong. We’ve been through far worse than this.”

“But we’ve never been apart… at least not since… your accident” 

“No… but we’ve overcome everything else that’s stood in our way… and if we can overcome my Mother, we can overcome your Father.” Delia hummed. “Oh cariad,” She breathed.

Patsy collapsed into Delia, sobs racking her body as she clung desperately to her wife. Delia pressed countless kisses into the red locks she loved so much, her hand smoothing the hair. She felt utterly torn - on one hand she was proud of her wife and pleased, pleased she was going to face her past, but on the other hand she was utterly devastated. She was heartbroken and she was scared. They’d always been a tag team - Patsy and Delia, Mum and Mam. She worried. Worried for how Emilee would deal without Patsy’s presence. She worried about how they would break the news to their daughter. 

“I’m sorry.” Patsy whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.” Delia murmured, “You’re doing the right thing.”

“I love you… I love you so much.” Patsy declared, sitting up and taking Delia’s face into her hands and leaning forward to kiss her. “Never, ever forget how much I love you.”

“I love you too.” Delia whimpered, “Now… we need to clean ourselves up, calm down and get back on the ward… we’ll be missed by now.”

Patsy nodded and swiped at her eyes. Delia did the same and together they stood, slowly making their way back onto the ward. As they did so, Ursula called Patsy’s name.

“Dr Mount…” 

Patsy took a moment before turning, a fake smile plastered on her face. Delia too turned.

“Nurse Busby, I asked for Doctor Mount.”

Delia spared Patsy a sympathetic smile before continuing down the corridor.

“Did I not make it clear the rules of this hospital?” Ursula asked.

“Perfectly.”

“Yet you chose to ignore them?”

Patsy noticed that there suddenly seemed to be a lot of people about. Trixie was there, Val, Chummy, Julienne, Phyllis… Delia too was lingering a little further up. 

“I thought you a better doctor than that.”

“I’m trying to be the best doctor and person I can be, Ursula.” Patsy snapped. “I came here because I wanted to go above and beyond for my patients… to be where I was needed most. And right now, I’m needed elsewhere, in Hong Kong with my dying Father. So here…” Patsy slammed her name badge down on the side, “take it. I’m off to spend time with my daughter before I leave her for god knows how long to care for my Father.”

Everyone watched as Patsy stormed past Ursula. 

“Excuse me.” Delia murmured before chasing after her wife.

Ursula took a shaky breath before picking up Patsy’s badge. All the staff glared at the their senior. The older woman forced the badge into Phyllis’ hands with her own well placed glare directed at the midwives stood around her.

“The show is over. Back to work.” She turned to Phyllis, “I’m sure you’ll have a place to put that.”

Phyllis shook her head - this wasn’t going to end well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed :)


End file.
